The One Written in Texas
By Zak Griffin
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| A good ol' fashioned Vancouver winter... in Longhorn country |
However, despite me being at the southern end of the continent, the days go by and hockey continues to be played, and you know what that means... it's the Saturday Night Wrap-Up!! YEEEHAWWWW!!!!!
Dallas Stars 3 vs. Pittsburgh Penguins 0
It's appropriate that we begin our journey in the great state of Texas, with the Dallas Stars doing battle against the best team in the east, the Pittsburgh Penguins. Kari "Frank Smith" Lehtonen had 24 saves for the shutout and is actually riding a two-game point streak, to lead his team to a valiant victory over Sidney Crosby and his gang of gorgeous athletes featuring Evgeni Malkin. Sergei Gonchar, Jaime Benn and Rich Peverley all scored to show that people from (in?) Texas know how to play hockey, proving me wrong. Until arriving in Texas, I thought that all Texans looked like this...
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| Some of them play hockey too! |
St. Louis Blues 4 vs New York Islanders 3 (SO)
They didn't make it easy on themselves, but the St. Louis Blues regained their winning ways, ending their four-game road trip by overcoming a 2-0 deficit (as well as a 3-2 deficit going into the third) en route to the win. If it weren't for T.J. Oshie's goal with 27 seconds remaining, I'd be writing a completely different wrap-up right now. Both goalies had to be sharp as each team had over 35 shots on goal, but the difference was (of all people) Kevin Shattenkirk, who beat Kevin Poulin in the third round of the shootout to ice the game. I swear I use that joke every week, but nobody says anything. So I'm gonna keep sayin' it 'til y'all make me stop!
Carolina Hurricanes 6 vs. Ottawa Senators 3
The Hurricanes are four games over the .500 mark for the first time this season. Recently, that success was to do with the hot play of the first line of Alexander Semin, Eric Staal and Jiri Tlusty, but on this night it was the other guys who pulled it out for the 'Canes. If Staal and Semin are the Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne Johnson of the Hurricanes, then Manny Malholtra and Nathan Gerbe are Will Ferrell and Marky Mark, and tonight was theirs to treasure. The Peacock, Gerbe, was finally allowed to fly and fly he did, potting a goal and two assists on the night. His efforts were only matched by the barracuda himself, Malholtra, who had two goals and an assist. Don't look now, but the 'Canes are buzzing, which means you have to ask yourself one thing...
Boston Bruins 6 vs. Philadelphia Flyers 1
I guess having four days off can do wonders for you. If you're a Bruin fan, you might want to see if you can get your team more time off, seeing as how they completely dominated the mighty Flyers of Philadelphia Saturday on four days of rest. Steve Mason continues to make the Flyers brass look good for re-signing him, as he was pulled again after allowing 4 goals on 19 shots. Jarome Iginla had two goals and two assists, Zdeno Chara had two goals and David Krejci had three assists in what was a very productive night for the majority of the team. Claude Giroux scored the lone goal for the Flyers and now has 15 on the year, and you know what that means... he only has 14 more than Mike Smith on the year. No wonder Team Canada cut him!
Washington Capitals 5 vs. Montreal Canadiens 0
There was a time when Braden Holtby had the worst stat line of any goaltender in the history of statistics, when he surrendered five goals on 11 shots against the Wild. Remember that game? Well it seems like Holtby either doesn't or he's trying to erase it from the minds of those who still do. The Caps net-minder stopped all 21 of the Habs' shots for the shutout, John Carlson scored a goal and Alexander Oven Chicken had a goal and an assist. All of these ingredients, combined with a healthy dose of Montreal suckiness was more than enough to help end the Capitals seven-game losing streak... but not enough to make me forget Holtby's .545 save percentage! Sorry Braden.
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| #neverforget |
Tampa Bay Lightning 5 vs. Colorado Avalanche 2
I don't know who Tyler Johnson is, but whoever he is, he's helping ease Lightning fans minds off that Steven Stamkos guy. Johnson, a 23-year old rookie from Spokane, Washington, potted his first ever career hat trick Saturday against the Avs. Don't look now, the guy has 16 goals and 18 assists on the year as well, good for 34 points tying him for first among rookies with Colorado's Nathan MacKinnon. Talk about a statement game.
Buffalo Sabres 5 vs. Columbus Blue Jackets 2
Of course it is. Of course, of all the teams to have fallen victim to the Blue Jackets during their eight-game winning streak, of course it should be the worst team, not only that they've played but in the entire league, that should end the madness and send Ryan Johansen and company into the losing column for the first time in nine games. Ryan Miller had a Ryan Miller-esque game, making 36 saves, while his counterpart, "Detective" Sergei Bobrovsky, was pulled after allowing three goals on 10 shots. Looks like this is a case that Bobrovsky should've been left alone... let's pray he doesn't take the law into his own hands and become... the BatBobrovsky!!
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| I'm not wearing hockey p... oh wait! |
Winnipeg Jets 5 vs. Toronto Maple Leafs 4 (OT)
Say what you want about Paul Maurice (that's right, I'm looking at you Gaetan Harris!), but the Jets are now winning hockey games. I mean, it wasn't the prettiest of efforts if you're a Jets fan, as the team surrendered a 4-1 lead after Phil Kessel tied the game up with a minute and a half remaining in regulation. But the team was able to get it done, thanks to the man known as The Big Buff, Dustin Byfuglien (pronounced Buff-lin), scoring his 12th of the season. Bryan Little and Blake Wheeler each had a goal and an assist and Ondrej (pronounced On-dredge) Pavelec had 24 saves on the night. James Reimer was pulled after surrendering four goals on 19 shots and Kessel netted a goal and an assist of his own in a losing effort. The Jets were terrible before Maurice came around and now they've won five of their last six... says something doesn't it?
San Jose Sharks 3 vs. Minnesota Wild 2 (OT)
The amount of LL Cool J inspired performances on Saturday night was unprecedented. So if we're not going to call it a comeback, then we'll call it a good performance lacking a solid start. But whatever you want to call it, the fact is that the Sharks trailed 2-0 early off of goals from Matt Cooke and Keith Ballard, his first as a Minnesota Wild. When down, the Sharks turned to their old (and newly re-signed) warhorses, as Patrick Marleau and Joe Thornton each scored to put the game on even terms and send the game to overtime. Then? Jumbo Joe struck again, potting his second of the contest, maybe to send a little message to his counterpart Marleau: "Anything you can do, I can do better. Wait...why are you on the Olympic team?"
Anaheim Ducks 3 vs. Los Angeles Kings 0
I've made it clear how much I dislike outdoor games, not to mention an outdoor game in California. So regardless of what I think of the whole "situation," sports were played at Chavez Ravine and in the end it was Jonas Hiller showing Jonathan Quick what's what, making 36 saves to get his fourth shutout of the season. Quick was less than stellar, stopping 18 of 20 shots on the night. I don't have much to say. Corey Perry and Matt Belesky scored goals, Andrew Cogliano scored an empty netter... go sports!
Well partners, that'll do it for me here in God's country. Hope y'all enjoyed yourselves, as usual, and I hope that you, as usual, keep your stick on the ice.
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Zak Griffin is the whitest person this editor has ever met. Follow him on the world's whitest Twitter machine at @ZakGriffin13.
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